Disappear (Again)

It's been a few days now
I am close... or closer
But I still feel far away
Sure you won't understand
But it feels like running full speed
Towards a giant wall
You know where you wanna go
You know what you wanna reach
You know where it ends
And where it begins
You even know its full dimensions
But you can't control it
You know you won't stop
At least I won't
Some things may seem impossible
They are not
I know believing is achieving
But it goes beyond that
By not believing we do not make it impossible
We just hold it back for a while
It's amazing the doors that can be opened inside your mind just by reaching the tip of your toes with the tip of your fingers just right there before your nose
It's amazing how naive we can become
It's amazing how we can just disappear
And disappear again just by holding back that, which we cannot stop
That, which we cannot control
That, which we are so afraid of
So yes, I'm gonna hit that wall
Flat face against it
Eyes wide open
And then.... I'll disappear ...Again

Nothing special

Have you ever killed a spider just because you could?
Or hurt sombody knowing and willing to do harm?
Is that what defines human kind?
Do we have to destroy everything that stands a finit distance from us?
I mean, do we really have to?
Sometimes I wish I'd disappeared
Sometimes I wish the world around me did

Disbelieve

Would you believe me if I told you I have no heart left?
That the beat you can hear through my chest
is just ice cracking in rythm?
Would you believe me if I told you my tears have run dry?
That the moisture on my face
is just rain condensed on my skin?
Would you believe me if I told you all that?
I truly hope that you don't coz if you do it'll mean that is true...

Burning dreams

Sometimes I think life's a bitch
When she plays cruel games with me
well...
Only when I'm drawn to lose
I feel like that these days
Like a giant mass of uncertainty
a little pawn on the table
These days I've lost my dreams
Maybe in a dirty old drawer
Maybe in the woods
Can't quiet tell
But surely I don't carry them with me
at least not tonight, not in my pocket
not even in my head
Nothing more I can do but sleep and sleep only
No flying feet
No talking trees
No horse-back riding through the hills of mars
No butterflies these days
Just measured time in physical space
So no, I won’t be burning dreams tonight
But wait for me, do not turn to dust
I'll only play along this stupid game called life for a little while

...FOOLS

1... 2... 3... or should I count backwards?
anyhow... I'm closer to you
and you don't know yet
...surprises
We're full of surprises
But you can't see me coming...
3... 2... 1...
there's you...
...there's me
can't see?
1... 2... 3...
turn around...
... it's me!

Friends with the Devil

Go, go, go now and make friends with the Devil
He speaks wiser words
He hums sweeter tunes
Than I could ever...
Just let me drown here on my own
Let me sink in this lake
With the roses
Across the city streets I loath
Among the trees I will always talk to
And you will always hear
But you won't listen
and even if you did you would not undersatnd
So go, go, go back to his garden of lies
We both know you'll believe him
So show me the ways to make you go
And just leave me here in the rain
So I can play with the trains while I sink in time
And my voices
Now go, go, go I've made friends with a gohst
and the wind is my ally
and it's dragging you in

In return

All your rage and fury
All your anger and hatred
Put those in my hands
and let's see what I turn them into
All your tears and dismay
All your fears and dread
Put them in my mouth
and let's watch what they do
All your words and glory
All your glances and disapproval
Put them in my voice
and let's wait for them to show
Now go ahead and run!
Now go ahead and hide!
For what you had you gave away
and I'm willing to give it back in a way.