Betrayal

I must admit it did hurt
But not as much as I thought it would
I'll give you that
I gave you more
It's good to know you're ok
Better the loss of uncertainty
Than the pain of the loss through it all
No, you, you didn't hurt that much after all

ruStling leaveS

Drifting like ice on an ocean that lacks inspiration
My thoughts melt down into infinite blackness
Marmalade drops
1, 2, 3 and again
Sinking
Fulfilling their path
as they answer their call to the ground
Thoughts I thought I'd never recall
Of the needless need of saying nothing
Of the bloodless words spat out of my fingers
Of the senseless voices consuming my talking
Silence quenching
1, 2, 3 and again

Spotless

I needed to see,
I needed to remember...
We are all fucked up versions of what we want to be,
What we wanted to be.
Happiness is over-rated,
It is a concept.
Happiness meaning absolute absence of sadness, does not exist,
It’s a balance of both and it depends on where the needle is pointing at,
At that exact moment, with huge amounts of pain in between...
That's what makes us real,
What defines us as living beings,
As beautifully imperfect humans...

'How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!The world forgetting, by the world forgot.Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd'

(Eloisa to Abelard by Alexander Pope)