Inside

I want to walk with you
I want to make sweet love to you
Maybe I don't
Maybe I do

Books in my head
Thoughts on my shelf
There`s noone dear
Everyone fears

I cannot stay just another day
Still I'm here with you
With you

This room's full of tears
Nobody's here
People so blue
Noone is true
I find myself running away
Away from you

Tears on my skin
Sweat on my sheets
All I can find each time you leave
Each time I die

Pages unread
Letters unsent
Words never said
I'm still with you

Clocks in my chest
Hearts on the wall
Everything's fine
Everything's worng
My hands out in the rain waiting for you
For you

I want to walk with you
With you
Maybe I don't
But maybe I do

The doubt

I wish I knew what to say
I wish I knew where to stay
But I honestly don´t
And the wind keeps blowing out in the street
But it doesn`t say a word
The clock is not helping
Just keeps eating the time
The time I don't have and so desperately need
Always the doubt
The uncertainty I'm so so familiar with
My true friend
Most silent and violent enemy
Its quietness get so loud some times
I can barely breathe
I wish I knew any answer
I wish I had any question
But I sincerely believe that I don´t
And that little drop never stops falling
Always reminding the time that it's taking with it down the drain
I wish I could turn my self into liquid
I wish I could turn myself into smoke
I wish I could turn myself into time
And STOP
Stop for a while to reconsider
or consider at all
Why am I always so doubtful?
What am I always so scared of?
When am I going to learn?

Chairs

And the chairs were silently moving through the room
Low voices chattered
And the eyes were reading the words
Page upon page of books older than them
Even the wood of the tables could tell a thousand more stories
More stories than them all gathered together
No need for words they said
With every silence
With every unspoken word
It was all understood
And we thought we were strong
That we could endure it all
And make it through
Then we could change the world
So wrong we were
So wrong we are
And the chairs still silently moving across the room

Soy

soy como una lágrima perdida en el mar
nadie sabe donde estoy
si con tu boca no pruebas mi sabor
hoy no quiero ser
porque ayer me desperté
en un mundo que estaba del revés
tu ya no eras tu
y yo ya no era yo
dos extraños y una taza de café
eras el silencio en una calle abandonada
yo era como el hielo perdido en la montaña
nadie sabe donde estamos
si nuestras voces se quedan sin palabras
tengo tanto que decir
pero nada que explicar
soy las palabras en el diario
que terminan en el fuego
para calentar tus manos
hoy no quiero ser
porque mañana aún estaré
en un mundo que sigue del revés
tu no serás tu
yo no seré yo
dos nombres sin rostros
caminando entre la gente

To see you

I wanna see you
hiding behind trees
the wind slowly pacing
while you whisper your sweet words
and I wait for them to reach me
while I wait in the rain
I wanna see you
coming towards me
while I'm holding my breath
and your hand holds my hand
I wanna see you
so close
so I can kiss you

Colors

I'm all shades of gray
The colors are gone
They've faded away
No feelings left
Nothing left
But gray, gray, gray...

Clocks

I could sleep the whole day
And I wouldn't mind
I could sleep all my life
And I still wouldn't mind
Just sleep it through
This day
I would like to be still for a while
No more pain or joy
I would like not to feel for some time
Not love, not hate
Just me and the days,
the hours, the minutes and seconds
The moments and nothingness
Just me and my heart
Singing to me, in rhythms
Its own pace, my pace
Calmly repeating itself
Me and my dreams,
The thoughts and words in my head
Peacefully playing its tune
To me
I could sleep the whole day today
And the days afer this day
But I would be missing so much
So I'll take a nap
And wake up just in time

For you, for her (wherever she may be)

She was gone a long time ago
Taken away by her disease
It was you who couldn’t let her go
She said goodbye in time
But you think you didn’t say it back
Now she’s left you
In the only way you could truly understand
It’s a lie, she only took what you could see
And left what cannot die
She is free again, what you remember
She’s again what she once was
Who she was
A woman, a mother’s daughter
Your mother
And a child
She runs faster than the horses
Following the wind
But don’t worry
You will always find her when you’re needy
Needy for her charms, and her comfort
Time to kiss her one last time
Only to remember that you can kiss her any time
How do you cope with the days after today?
How do you cope with the days without her?
Wish I knew
If I knew the method
I would simply give it to you
And I’m always here
And she’ll always be with you
And remember
You can kiss her any time
She will always kiss you back

So good

Hey there stranger / You've been my pastime for a while now / We started out easily /
And so our night just flowed / As we learnt more about / The tale our skins let on / Underneath the moonlight / On a cold winter`s night /
OH Stranger / Are you the one I want / On the other side of my phone line? / Hey Stranger / Am I the one you wanna talk to / When you get home from a long day? / My sweet Stranger / You are the one I think of / When I stare at the clock on the wall / On a long day at work / Oh my Stranger / Do you think of me too? / Coz maybe I like you /
We were caught by the morning /Shared some bitter coffee still in bed / And a SWEET kiss / Sleepy eyes behind a messed up hair / And the words were so perfect / As we said more about / The things that we care for / And the city so still / Underneath the sunlight / On a cool winter's day /
Hey there Stranger / You've been my distraction for some time / And I think it's time now / We both start to remember our NAMES / Coz maybe I like you

I thought I knew

All I know is we'll take separate ways
Until the day we meet again
I just don't know
And I can`t tell

You'll sail away
To a land that has no name
To the same place you said you were running from
And you called home

I know you'll go away
But before you go
Take the time and kiss me slow
So I won't forget the way I feel today

All I know is that we took separate ways
Until the day we meet again
I just don't know
And I can`t tell

I`ll walk away
To the land that never knew your name
To the same place I'm running from
And I call home

I know I'll go away
But before I go
I'll take the time to kiss you slow
So you won't forget the way you make me feel today

Sparks and Apples

Little spark burn brighter than before
Brighter than the sun
The way I know you know
Blind me and burn it all
All I knew before
Glow trhough the night
And I will follow
Be only my guide
And errase all the sorrow

I'll let the wind and the rain take away what remains

Roll apple roll
Over the concrete
Follow my path
Reach for your destination
And bring me back home

Don't

Don't ask me if I'm fine
Cos I'm not
Don't ask me for an answer
Coz I have none
Not today
Not tomorrow
I am dealing with this thing
The best I can
The best I know
Maybe I should know better
But I don't
So don't ask me if I'm fine
Coz I can't
Don't demand for explanations
Coz there´s none I can give you
At least not the one you wanna hear
Or the one I wanna give
So don't push me
Coz I'm fragile
And don't ask me if I'm fine
Coz the answer is I'm not

Spare me

A thousand times I've said this to myself
A thousand times I've said this outloud
One time too many
And never quite understood

Spare me the guilt in your eyes
Sapre me the smile and the lie
Take the unfortunate speech
Take whatever you need

More than you reckon I've silenced my voice
More than you reckon I've swollowed my words
One time too many
And never quite understood

Spare me the door closed behind you
Spare me the back of your head
Leave the fortunate kiss
Leave whatever you please

One more time I've unfolded my ears
One more time I've opened my eyes
One time too many
And never quite understood

Spare me the dreadfully sorry
Spare me the tear and the hand
Keep the uncountable times
Keep whatever you find

Stay a while if you must
But please
Spare me the crap
and truthfully say what is it you want

Amends / Tiny bottles

Some bottles were broken
Some bottles were stolen
Others I smiply can't find
The ones that have turn to bitter
The ones refilled with anger and doubt
Can't fix what I can't undo
Can't undo what I didn't do
My own private collection
Now incomplete
The trust that we've killed used to bind us
Kept us together
A rape of the mind
Most violent selection
of unspoken words that hurt from the distance
Now keeps us apart
No scent to remember is left
No memory but sadness we kept
Regret and remorse will now settle
With time we will even forget
We can pretend we can fix what is broken
We can return or replace whatever was stolen
But I can't bring trust back to life
Not without you

Unexpected

He´ll be back
when the ocean spits him out
Unprotected
Kiss the tide
she will bring the one back
So awaited
Break the vow
that you said you would not dare
And take him
Let the city take you in
She will protect you
Kiss the fire
He will keep you warm
Don't reject him
Trust the waves
they will bring him back to you
Neglected
You'll be back
I will let you go away
She'll return to me
So unexpected

Cry

In all those times
I never thought
I would become so numb at all
or that I was insensible
I always thought that I was strong
But now you think that I am weak
or that my heart has turned to ice
I can't believe that's what you see
There is much more inside of me
I'm not the kid I used to be
yet I'm still alive but you can't see
There's more of me than you believe
I can't cry now
I just need time
I need more time
I need you now to trust in me
I ask you now to wait for me
Just wait a while and you'll believe
I am not dead
You're just too scared
I'm not afraid
I need to feel comfortable
I need to know I'm not alone
Still I can't cry
I can't cry now
I need some time
I need more time
To let it out

Angel

I fell
Sank low
But I'm back on my feet
Back on my horse
Ready for battle
Willing to struggle
To get back what's mine

If only a feather left
To prove you were an angel

I've lost
Forsaken all
But I'm back to claim it
And back for more
Ready to breathe
Willing to drink it all
To take it and never let go

If only a feather left
Still proof you were an angel

Stranger

Now he hides behind a smile
It's easy for him
Easier for them
Much easier for us
Almost convenient one would say at the start
If there are no questions
There's no need for answers
How cold in the darkness
How calm on the surface
How lost in the depths
When noone remains
With time he won't remember
With time they will forget
Forever pretending that there is no pain
Us in the middle
Them on the right
Him to the left
All dead in the end
All dead in the end

With a kiss upon my lips

You said...
'Go to bed
Lean your head
Close your eyes
Drift away
You'll be safe'
Then you left

Pieces of Puzzles the Kitten Has Eaten

So I think and I say
You got your honesty from a cereal box
Just as fake as plastic can be
And fortune cookies are not the way
Not even close to the real thing
So pack up your lies and your shame
You can come back but this time
I won't stay
You know the wind can blow me away
And I won't come back with the rain
So I think and I say
You got your words from a scrabble game
Too many letters together can score high
But out in the world
It's the meaning what counts
And you
Just as true as a horoscope can turn out to be
On a metro line on the back of the pages
Along with the crosswords and weather predictions
So I think and I say
I believe in you as much as I have faith in religion
My sunday sermon or anything purple
You know horses can ride me away
And I won't come back with the tide
Alice has grown and Neverland is off of the map
So you're just the dirt on the playground
We all leave behind
You're pieces of puzzles the kitten has eaten

Pass me by

If you knew me I'm sure you'd stay
If you knew me well I bet you'd run away
This is how I feel
I tell you now what goes through my head
We're gonna meet up again
We'll smile and hold the tears back inside
We'll say we'll call and we'll lie
Pretend everything's perfectly fine
I ask you now
Is this how you feel?

Nights

I'm lying here in my bed
Hat still on
Thinking random thoughts
Characters playing for me
Just like almost every night
for the past few weeks
So faithful
Almost unnoticed
Yet so present
So I'm waiting
For it to disappear
Or you showing up
None of which could possibly happen
Uncertainty
The wait
Such a weight to speed up my sinking
Deep down
And deeper down even still
Where I used to linger
Where I used to hide
It seemed right and safe back then
Erasing thoughts could be so simple
So easy
If we weren't that much complicated
Insecure
So reluctant to let go
Just a call to say 'goodbye'
Or 'hello'
But it is always a 'don't go'
but 'don't come too close'
So I stand in the middle
And wait
While everything around keeps moving
So I take off my hat
I turn around
And I sleep

Selfish

A world that could change
according to your needs
That could save us all,
at least it could save me

Time to make a toast
to great fucking liars like you
I believed the lie
I believed in you
And it turned out
The Lie
It was you

Not even goodbye...

So yes, the words I use are `I love you`
Did I say it?
Well,
No, of course not
Another loss,
Another excuse to grieve,
Another item to add to my special list of regrets
So this is it
`I love you` doesn't necessarily mean
or even imply love
It is the concept
The idea you can find someone special,
The slightes possibility it could be the one,
That is what really matters and motivates you
The options and oportunities,
The making up plans
More than actually finding any of the above
It is the simple things,
The small thing we tend to overlook and miss
over the overwhleming sound of words,
that we saddly forget to enjoy
So yes, I'll keep using those words
Maybe in my head, maybe out loud now
But remember... I don't mean love

Voices

Why would you say what you say?
If you don't even mean it
Why would you lure me with words?
Why would you play me like this?
If you don't really want me
I know you're confused
I know of your troubles
Would my words change your mind?
Clearly they wouldn't
But I'm surely hopeful
That they'll open your eyes
And you'll see what you're doing
What your wasting and missing
Until you fully understand
That you're truly mistaken
Running away towards nothing
Chasing down feelings
That should already be burried
Before it's too late
And you're dreadfully sorry
I speak with the voice from my past
That stands right beside me
Experience has tought me
Mistakes are forever
Time never waits
It has its own pace
We run out of time
We're always too late
So why would you say what you said?
If you didn't mean it
If you wouldn't stay

My own private collection

Friends
I collect them
Each one unique
Amazing miniatures of perfectly combined qualities
Like tiny bottles containing a scent
Sweet and bitter at times
So full of memories
Like millions of raindrops all gathered together
Each one alone holding a different world
Some I will carry with me in my pocket
Some I will keep on my shelf
Others apparently lost in a drawer
But none I will ever forget
And always there's room for another
The new ones I'll gladly collect
They give without taking
They receive with a smile
Through good times and hard times
They're always the whisper, the tear and the laughter
They make me, complete me and change me
In ways I could not even tell
Virtues and flaws sincerely presented
I take them
I keep them
And dearly I hold them
They know the secrets, the fears, the dark parts and lies
And keep them away so that they can't harm
Unconditional, loving and caring
Protective and beautiful
They're all photographs in this book I call life
So if you happen to read this
Know that I love you
And believe when I write that you make me better

Hearts

this feeling constantly changing
yet perfectly still
we're good at pretending
we're best at coming undone
we think
we say
we hope
and we never let go
this rapture almost euphoric
yet violently empty
we're blessed at the start
we're damned at the end
we fall
we crash
we cry
and we ask for more
this thoughts obviously perfect
yet clearly mistaken
we're told to be grand
we're doomed to survive
we starve
we eat
we scream
and we even deny
this pain almost immobile
yet silently growing
we're great at defending
we're genius at hurting
we live
we love
we die
and in the middle we lie

Buses

I can't stand people on buses
The way they behave and invade spaces
The faces, the smells
The looks on their faces whenever you reach out to open a window
or for an empty seat
I can feel their worries, their everyday problems they carry as a backpack on their way home
Tolerance
I wish I knew what it means
What it really means
Is it thinking and not saying?
Hating and disapproving in silence?
I'm quite sure that's not it
I sometimes wish they'd all jut disappeared,
gone forever
I certainly wouldn't miss them
Their missery, their sadness
They keep me out of focus
Disctracting me from the viewing
Buildings and people on foot
Somehow they seem momentarily intruiguing
Somewhat interesting
Two different worlds separated by a thin piece of glass
I like how the rain distorts and reflects whatever stands on the other side
Specially traffic lights
So I take a different bus everyday
Or I simply walk
Same streets, same stops become almost unbearable
Overwhelming at times
To the point I could just scream
Or cry
Would I feel any different if the bus was empty?
If it was just me and the world outside?
Could I feel any safer?
Any more comfortable?
What is it that I find so repulsive?
Is it closeness?

Songs

Seven songs on a table
Looking at strangers walk by out the window
Searching for a face
A familiar look
Amongst cabs and cars running by
Two missed calls
Seven text messages
Hard isn't easy if easy isn't hard
You've killed me twice
But I'm still alive
And the heart that you stole
I don't want it back
No cards on the table
And the glasses are empty
A bunch of left overs
And the voices of friends on the background
You say you're a jerk for letting me go
I say I'm a fool for pushing so hard
But I like the word
So I'll give it a try
Friends are forever
Lovers are not

Tonight

Just forget about the world
What we have is tonight
So let's enjoy it
That's all we'll have by morning
We'll go back to our lives
To our troubled minds
We'll simply wake up to another day
And walk separate ways
But we'll still have this
We'll still have tonight
Just you and me
And nothing in between

Hey Rockstar

I've missed many trains many times before,
for many different reasons
It was always my choice, and many times
I've looked back to realize it was too late
But I'm not giving up this time,
not any time soon
I am not giving up on you
just as easy as before
I'm boarding this train now,
whatever consequences it may bring along
And I hope you'll be on it too
I barely know you, but with you
breathing it's easier
And I know it is you who make me feel better
So let go of the fear of losing what you've already lost,
take my hand and you will be found
I've nothing to offer you but me,
can't compete with gohsts from the past that live in the now
And it's not what I want
Cards are now on the table
I want you
And you can have me